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404
Mar 15, 2011
03/11
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see if america's most prescribed e.d. treatment is right for you. [ male announcer ] build your better breakfast with all the flavors you choose. try an irresistible steak, egg & cheese, with toasty tomato or chipotle southwest sauce on tasty flatbread. only at subway! ♪ ♪ [ male announcer ] unrestrained. unexpected. and unlike any hybrid you have ever known. ♪ introducing the most fuel-efficient luxury car available. ♪ the radically new, 42 mile per gallon ct hybrid from lexus. ♪ welcome to the darker side of green. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. oh, man, good to be back. i've had a great day, a great tomorrow. guys it's time to play a game that was listed as number seven on "games" magazine's list of hottest games of 2011. [ laughter ] that's right. it's time to do some "doll posin'." here we go. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: all right, everybody. check out my little friend right here. yeah. [ audience aws ] it's this tired little baby monkey -- just hanging out on a banana
see if america's most prescribed e.d. treatment is right for you. [ male announcer ] build your better breakfast with all the flavors you choose. try an irresistible steak, egg & cheese, with toasty tomato or chipotle southwest sauce on tasty flatbread. only at subway! ♪ ♪ [ male announcer ] unrestrained. unexpected. and unlike any hybrid you have ever known. ♪ introducing the most fuel-efficient luxury car available. ♪ the radically new, 42 mile per gallon ct hybrid from lexus. ♪...
240
240
Mar 1, 2011
03/11
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KNTV
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eye 240
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america's diner is always open. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. our next guest is making her american tv debut with us tonight to perform the song "mirrorage," from her new album, "ring." please welcome glasser. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ we live alone we live alone ♪ ♪ oh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah oh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ♪ ♪ unearthed, a great divide a dark, untrusted plane the self a lonely terrain with temporary lines ♪ ♪ how can i trust in you? how can i trust in you? ♪ ♪ oh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah oh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ♪ ♪ ♪ i'm stabbing at the air at nothing but something pulls me under ♪ ♪ how can i trust in you? how can i trust in you? ♪ ♪ oh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah oh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah oh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ♪ ♪ a flaw in the flat screen of my mind's eye a hot spot in the dark mirrorage ♪ ♪ how can i trust in you
america's diner is always open. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. our next guest is making her american tv debut with us tonight to perform the song "mirrorage," from her new album, "ring." please welcome glasser. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ we live alone we live alone ♪ ♪ oh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah oh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ooh-ah ♪ ♪ unearthed, a great divide a dark, untrusted plane the self a lonely...
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141
Mar 5, 2011
03/11
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america's diner is always open. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to kathy bates, chris pratt, lupe fiasco! and the greatest band in late night, the roots, right here, you guys. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for watching. stay tuned for carson daly, have a great weekend! i hope to see you next week. buh-bye. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
america's diner is always open. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to kathy bates, chris pratt, lupe fiasco! and the greatest band in late night, the roots, right here, you guys. [ cheers and applause ] thank you for watching. stay tuned for carson daly, have a great weekend! i hope to see you next week. buh-bye. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
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228
Mar 16, 2011
03/11
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KNTV
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i love america so much, i'm making an all american jack combo two jumbo patties, with melting cheese, lettuce, tomato and pickles, plus fries and a drink for only $4.99. i've celebrated every american tradition...except one... spring break cancun yo!!!!!!!! try the all american jack and enter to win an all-american spring break for you and 10 of your friends.
i love america so much, i'm making an all american jack combo two jumbo patties, with melting cheese, lettuce, tomato and pickles, plus fries and a drink for only $4.99. i've celebrated every american tradition...except one... spring break cancun yo!!!!!!!! try the all american jack and enter to win an all-american spring break for you and 10 of your friends.
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230
Mar 15, 2011
03/11
by
KNTV
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eye 230
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"jersey shore" marathon on super bowl sunday. [ cheers and applause ] so when you're done watching america's most violent pastime, you can then switch over to the super bowl. [ laughter ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] i'm sorry. >> steve: you galluped. >> jimmy: yeah, i was doing horse. i didn't know what was going on. [ laughter ] >> steve: the bumpy horse. >> jimmy: like that's a dance. yeah, yeah. >> steve: "hey, it's the bumpy horse." >> jimmy: i just started doing the horse. i don't know what happened. [ light laughter ] this is pretty crazy, you guys. a man here in new york was arrested yesterday for stealing a garbage truck. [ light laughter ] that's too bad because he was this close to having all that garbage. [ laughter ] you know? that's right. a man in new york stole a garbage truck. people knew it wasn't a real new york garbage man because he kept stopping to pick up trash. [ laughter ] "that's weird. he usually just parks in the middle of the street and we just wait for him." big news. it was announced today that egyptian president hosni mubarak's son, gamal, won't run for preside
"jersey shore" marathon on super bowl sunday. [ cheers and applause ] so when you're done watching america's most violent pastime, you can then switch over to the super bowl. [ laughter ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] i'm sorry. >> steve: you galluped. >> jimmy: yeah, i was doing horse. i didn't know what was going on. [ laughter ] >> steve: the bumpy horse. >> jimmy: like that's a dance. yeah, yeah. >> steve: "hey, it's the bumpy horse." >>...
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202
Mar 8, 2011
03/11
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KNTV
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eye 202
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america's diner is always open. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >>> jimmy: welcome back. i'm hanging out with the one and only dana carvey. the one and only. [ cheers and applause ] [ talking over one another ] >> jimmy: -- your thighs were getting -- >> yeah, my thigh and tummy area. i tend to put on a few pounds in my thigh and tummy area. >> jimmy: you do a little -- >> and my buns! [ light laughter ] that gets a laugh normally. just the word "buns." [ light laughter ] yeah. >> jimmy: lyle, the effeminate heterosexual coming back? >> i don't know. it's possible. >> jimmy: i love lyle. >> do they know that one? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yes, of course. >> that's insane. that was robert smigel's thing. lyle -- and i had to -- i couldn't do the church lady, because i have a hard time -- because she's like this, you know, basically. "well --" so i had to come up with a different voice for lyle. so i sort of made him like this. why does everyone think that i'm gay? that was because i couldn't get up in the church lady register. >> jimmy: lyle wasn't gay. >> he wasn'
america's diner is always open. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >>> jimmy: welcome back. i'm hanging out with the one and only dana carvey. the one and only. [ cheers and applause ] [ talking over one another ] >> jimmy: -- your thighs were getting -- >> yeah, my thigh and tummy area. i tend to put on a few pounds in my thigh and tummy area. >> jimmy: you do a little -- >> and my buns! [ light laughter ] that gets a laugh normally. just the word "buns." [...
101
101
Mar 30, 2011
03/11
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eye 101
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. >> jimmy: so now you want to take him out around america. so you take him to miami sold out thing, its so many tickets. you go, let's add an afternoon show. >> 10,000 seats. >> jimmy: 10,000 seats. >> sold out. >> jimmy: and one rule, he's like, there can't be empty seats? >> two rules. no empty seats, and don't put big shots in the front rows. put my fans in the front rows because i have to work to them. i need the girls there, you know. and i said, i got it, i got it, i got it. and i said, you got it. i put the show on sale, it sold out immediately. i went back to elvis and i said, how about a matinee? he said, sure, great, no problem. i'll do a breakfast show, if i get paid. i said, do a matinee. so i put the matinee on sale, three days later they said, you're sold out. now it was july 4th weekend in miami beach. i don't know if you've ever been to miami beach, florida on july 4th weekend. but the alligators leave town. they don't want -- its too hot. >> jimmy: nobody -- it's too hot. too hot, yeah, yeah, yeah. >> it's too hot. so i went
. >> jimmy: so now you want to take him out around america. so you take him to miami sold out thing, its so many tickets. you go, let's add an afternoon show. >> 10,000 seats. >> jimmy: 10,000 seats. >> sold out. >> jimmy: and one rule, he's like, there can't be empty seats? >> two rules. no empty seats, and don't put big shots in the front rows. put my fans in the front rows because i have to work to them. i need the girls there, you know. and i said, i got...
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134
Mar 11, 2011
03/11
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eye 134
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straight from the desk of america's news anchor, this stapler from staples was most recently used to attach some of brian's taxi receipts to his monthly expense report. the value of this slightly used stapler, $7.99. jimmy? >> jimmy: there you go. fantastic. thank you, so much. this is brian williams' stapler. and higgins, is there a lick zone on this? >> announcer: yes. the lick zone is along either side. the lick zone is along either side. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: thank you so much. i appreciate that. the lick zone is on either side of the stapler. okay. so, you can just go for it. it could be that side. it could be this side. you thinking of a side? >> i'm a leftie. i'm going to go left side. >> jimmy: ooh. [ scattered applause ] all right. very good. [ light laughter ] are you ready? >> i'm ready. >> jimmy: go for it. roots, a little music? ♪ [ laughter ] >> jimmy: okay. how'd it feel? [ cheers and applause ] it feel okay? not too -- because that's brian williams' hand sweat from stapling. let's look at that in super sexy slow-motion. ♪ [ laughter ] >> jimmy: there you go. [ la
straight from the desk of america's news anchor, this stapler from staples was most recently used to attach some of brian's taxi receipts to his monthly expense report. the value of this slightly used stapler, $7.99. jimmy? >> jimmy: there you go. fantastic. thank you, so much. this is brian williams' stapler. and higgins, is there a lick zone on this? >> announcer: yes. the lick zone is along either side. the lick zone is along either side. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: thank you so...